Disenfranchised grievance is grievance experienced by an individual that is not openly recognized, socially validated, or publicly observed. The loss experienced is real, but no one around them grants survivors the “right to mourn.” An individual may have an intense and multifaceted reaction to a loss, but those around them completely ignore or invalidate the sadness that person may feel. Society at large is simply not comfortable with complaints and for the most part completely ignores many cases of complaints.
Some examples of disenfranchised complaints are:
1) Loss of a pregnancy due to miscarriage
has. People say stupid things like “you can always have another baby”.
2) Loss of a pregnancy by abortion
has. There is no public place and total lack of permission to mourn the loss of the voluntary termination of pregnancy.
3) Loss of a child in an adoption process
has. Total lack of understanding on the part of society in general.
4) Death of an ex-husband or ex-wife
has. People are like, “Wow! You should be glad they’re not in your life anymore!”
5) Separation from a gay couple
has. Total lack of recognition by society as a whole.
When a person finds themselves in a disenfranchised tort circumstance, they are unable to process the emotions involved with that loss. They will usually do this completely on their own and without any support system. The grieving process is always best done in community. It is important that others share the tears and pain of loss. However, in the cases mentioned above, the parties involved in these losses are completely abandoned and isolated in their grief.
While there is a huge movement of grievance support groups in our nation, even those groups are unlikely to touch the losses mentioned above, unless someone finds their special group niche. They are available but sometimes hard to find.
The grieving process can be a long, difficult, and painful process. The ideal way to grieve, once again, is to have someone walk through that valley of pain with you. It is the isolation and abandonment that accumulates even more coals of pain in the heart of one in a situation of disenfranchised grievance.
Without the validation and confirmation of another person, the emotions of sadness are repressed. Eventually, a disenfranchised person will find himself with a case of full-blown depression.
Some common signs of depression are:
1) Lack of interest in things that used to bring joy
2) Difficulty getting out of bed in the morning
3) Feeling sluggish and tired.
4) Inability to sleep or restless sleep
5) General feeling of sadness
6) Crying fits
7) Feel fearful
Disenfranchised grievance needs a community to heal. If you are suffering from depression caused by disenfranchisement, it is important that you find someone to walk with you through the valley of sadness. You can find a professional who is trained in grievance counseling or find the particular support group that would be relevant to you. At a minimum, it’s important to find a friend who can listen to your story and be a safe place to cry with you.
